Rarely Beautiful Moron Ever Exist

Me and you

Simplify things...
Call us we

posted by Jane Doe @ 8:33 AM 0 comments

How can i describe the past few weeks?

this will do...

posted by Jane Doe @ 11:00 AM 0 comments

Dia & Aku berkata

dia berkata...
aku terlahir sendiri, tiada pernah mengenal yg namanya berbagi, apa yg aku mau aku harus dapat. aku terlambat mengenal apa yang namanya mengerti dan memahami orang lain, aku terlambat mengerti mengapa aku harus bertoleransi. Aku baru saja bangun dari tidurku yang panjang. Bangun dan belajar merangkak. Egois sudah mendarah daging selama 20 tahun. Sebelum mengenal kamu aku adalah orang yang tidak mau peduli dgn orang lain. Tapi setelah mengenal kamu aku berubah 180 derajat. Hidupku penuh warna. Bagiku tak satupun orang yg boleh merenggut kamu dari aku...aku ingin kamu jadi miliku, yang aku tau kemudian, kl itu tidaklah mungkin. Tuntutan ada salah satu anggota dari egois..EGOIS...dan itulah aku.

aku berkata...
aku terlahir diantara banyak orang, tetapi aku merasa sendiri. Aku diajar untuk memahami, menekan ego, dan berdiri diatas kaki sendiri. Aku anak angin dan air, aku datang, aku pergi, dan aku sendiri. Aku jatuh, aku menari, dan aku sendiri lagi. Aku bukan api yang bisa berteriak. Aku hanya bisa menjadi awan, terbawa angin, terbentur awan lain, berkumpul sebentar, melimpahkan air, berdansa, dan pergi lagi terbawa angin. Aku tidak menuntut banyak, hanya kejujuran untuk menerangi jalanku dan keleluasaan untuk aku terbang. Tapi aku berjanji aku selalu akan tinggal dan berputar lagi diatasmu, menurunkan air dan membawa kesejukan, lagi.

posted by Jane Doe @ 10:58 AM 1 comments

Beijing Olympic 18/08/08

Table Tennis
• Singapore should not put a Whang-kers with "not-in-shape" look to compete in table tennis.
• In winner ceremony, please highlight more on the girl with the blue dress.

Swimming
• Michael Phelps is alittle bit overrated, but he's ok!
• Man in LZR racer is now hotter than in speedo style.

Tennis
• Only remember having a rush of libido when Rafael Nadal lying down and screaming...

JADE SEAH wore too much clothes on! And she's stupid! Please put FIONA XIE—our national hero—to replace this dum dum.

Men's Floor Exercises
• China, Japan and Spain, not shave their armpit.
• Brazil's male gymnast seemed to have no problem at all to get in touch with his feminine side.
• German's gymnast crotch zoom-in and slow motion replay, did jellied me down.
• I must vote for more slow motion replay.
• I must say that matching underwear's color with loose pants will look better on TV! It's do-able.
• Russia was grouchy as always... no fun or sense of humor at all, he had the grudge for China's gymnast. How come this little prick with unshaved armpit and smal body won the gold medal?!
• The girls in the blue dress for winner ceremony this time sucks. Only one that has a nice boobs.
• Oh there you go again... Nice boobs

Women's Vault
• German sent the wrong sex to compete in Women Gymnastic. Oksana is a man.
• I understand the concept of "stand-out," but they seemed to not understand the word elegant. For fuck's sake, shiny-shiny is overrated. Again, better fashion advisor needed.
• China's gymnast starting pose, looks like that she has a 3 sec. heartattack.
• So called "Brazil's butterfly" keep spitting on her hands.
• I forgot who keeps licking her hands after touching the powder on the floor...

Men's Pommel Horse
• I'm not a man but my legs turned to jelly, I feel like I have balls too.

posted by Jane Doe @ 10:56 AM 0 comments

Normal guide to double date with not-so-clear-marital-status neighbour with crazy Swedish, and vomiting-on-heavy-case girl with her imaginary date

B’s VERSION
You win. Let's double date

Neighboor: Hi B!
Me:Hi neighboor! Are you married?.
Neighboor: I...
Me: Are you watching olympics (says this because she has been told to do so by Adrienne) . Olympics would be more fun if they are naked all the time. Did I tell you I do a lot sports I am an avid weigh lifter, I bench press 250 kilos with one arm every day. You can probably tell. My butt itches. You want to see my underwear? Their nice. My friend Intan says they look granny underwear but I think they are nice, they were cheap. Their new , I don't wear second hand underwear althouhg I am broke. Do you make a lot of money? How much?
Neighobor: Ahh
Me: Oh yeah, can I have some. Oh yeah are you married? Can I sleep with you now because I don't date. It's a long story, but I fate.
Neighboor: mmrr
Me: Meet my friend intan. Intan this my neighboor
Intan: Vomit

INTAN’s VERSION
You win. Let's double date

Neighboor: Hi B!
Me: Hey you! Oooh the weather is so nice, are you married?.
Neighboor: Whaaat...?
Me: Do you play golf? I can be golf balls. Do you like pets? I can behave like one... See... Now my butt itches. You want to see my underwear? They’re nice. My friend Intan said they look granny underwear but I think they are nice, they were cheap, and they keep finding their own way to stuck in my ass. They’re new , I don't wear second hand underwear although I am broke, but you know I wear side A and side B way, Intan is the one who teach me how. Do you make a lot of money? How much?
Neighobor: Whaaat...?
Intan: Yabadi yabada da da da... La la la
Me: Oh yeah, can I have some? I mean, all... Can I sleep with you now because I don't date. It's a long story, but I fate. I mean, I’m a maniac!
Neighboor: mmrr
Me: Meet my friend intan. Intan this my neighboor, she’s normal and beautiful! Really...
Intan: Vomit

posted by Jane Doe @ 10:31 AM 1 comments

posted by Jane Doe @ 10:15 AM 0 comments

posted by Jane Doe @ 10:08 AM 0 comments

From Brishit :)

posted by Jane Doe @ 10:06 AM 0 comments

Hanging Balls and Peeping Nipples

Do you remember my first sentence to you?
Morning, how are you?
Who are you?
Just another old human being wait for whatever cross your path.

Oh well you've proved me wrong.
I enjoy the fact that you're so shy, and yet wild.
So secluded, yet I can smell freedom whenever you're around.
I like the fact when you mentioned that I know you.

Booooring...

Anyway, thanks for letting me to strip you off...
Not completely naked, but close.
And it's 2 not 3, now i know.

Bare this in your mind.
For me,wandering around naked in jungle of boredom.
Hanging balls and peeping nipples greet boring people is indescribable.

posted by Jane Doe @ 10:06 PM 0 comments

Clap Now!

He loves me, he loves me not, he loves me, he loves me not, she loves me, i mean he loves me or maybe not. And I swear that I won't be better until he loves me. I don't like negotiation!
Start having the big picture on what's this crap all about?

So the story goes, on one fine day, really one fine day...
A girl signed on the messenger and put a heart breaking, devastating, creating suicidal tendencies and homicidal imagination... (Please understand, I have to spice up this life a bit so trust me this is truly one devastating status)

"It won't make any sounds if only one hand that's clapping."

First of all, I guess all the kindergarten kids know that clapping need two hands.
Second of all, why she has to ruin my fine day when i looked really good with my super sexy new white pants. I decided i have to let her suffer no more. I decided to give her some revelation.

"Yes sweetie, there won't be any noise if it's only one hand that's clapping. But in case you haven't heard, clap means to striking together two flat surfaces, as in the body parts... not necessarily hands. So, have you got the big picture? Ney? Okay... lift your right hand up then strike your hand and your cheek, i bet it makes some sounds. Nice and unforgettable, oh i forgot to add some shame."

I bet there's a bitter smile across, did I just cyber slap you?

And what the f@*k... now her status is "You got me begging you for mercy..."
Get yourself a sex doll... Girl, you need to get laid, real hard!

posted by Jane Doe @ 9:41 AM 0 comments